True Blood Season 5 Ep. 10 'Gone, Gone, Gone'


As always, spoilers are ahead. If you haven't watched the show, then move on, 'cuz no one effs with us in our house...

With only two episodes left, all paths continue to lead to the vampire/human showdown. But while there were vamp deaths a plenty this week, 'Gone, Gone, Gone's focus was more on the emotional loss many of the characters are feeling as the trickle down effects of the Authority's plan throw their worlds into upheaval.

Speaking of The Authority, all seems to be going as planned, as vampire-on-human violence has spiked 50 percent in the wake of the True Blood factory bombings. Steve Newlin, easily trading his pre-vampire role as fundamentalist hatemonger for hollow political shill (a.k.a the New Nan Flanagan--damn I miss her), continues to assure the public that all is well. But judging from the near shoot-out at Merlotte's after two wooden-bullet packing rednecks tried to go Obama mask on Jessica (thank goodness for Lafayette and Sam--vampires, shifters and mediums gotta stick together), the human population isn't exactly buying what he's selling.

After toying with what would probably be her first real meal in days, Jessica lets her would-be attacker go, before Jason, and then Hoyt, happen to walk into the bar. Rather than rehash the whole "you-broke-my-heart-and-banged-my-girlfriend-girlfriend-fucker" routine of the last season and a half, Hoyt, fresh out of the hospital and sick of life in Bon Temps, is heading off to Alaska. This send off screams Tara season three, but Hoyt one ups her by asking Jessica to glamour him so he'll have no recollection of her or Jason.

Both this and the scene where Jason pulls Hoyt over and tries to jog his memory one last time before bursting into tears in his squad car were surprisingly poignant and sadly ironic. Hoyt's mind reset has allowed him to finally forgive the both of them, but at the cost of losing him entirely. I liked Hoyt as a character for the most part, but it was time to give him the boot, as he really hasn't been given much to do this season other than be pathetic and bitter. Hopefully Maxine will treat Jason like her new son/invalid, so we won't had to do without any countrified bigotry.

Jessica may be missing her man, but Bill's got other plans for his progeny, like recruiting her into the church of Lilith. She smiles and plays along while he babbles about the joys of his newfound faith, but tells him all the religious talk reminds her of her father's bible studies, which probably means she's not in a rush to convert. Of course she could learn like Eric, who watched Godric get eviscerated by Lilith in another blood-fueled hallucination (geez Godric, even as a ghost you suck) or the techie chick, staked by her own app, that resistance is futile. Though after Russell's big blowup over wanting to synthesize fairy blood at the "education reform" meeting, I doubt indoctrination is high on the Authority's list.

Who else wasn't shocked at this? It was obvious from the way he hilariously undermined Salome and the other members' earnestness during prayer, used meetings to ki ki and flirt with Steve, and the half repulsed, half disappointed look on his face when Eric bowed and kissed his ring (he must really be sprung on Newlin not to jump on that) that he was waiting for just the right moment to show his true colors. You can only keep the crazy cooped up for so long. All I can is the Moulin Fairy better have top notch security, but I have a feeling Eric and Bill will provide back up now that Sookie needs to be protected, again.

Meanwhile, Pam is still trying to adjust to the new sheriff in town, who, in addition to taking a cut of Fangtasia's now meager profits, demands 30 new baby vamps be created by the end of the year, or everything Pam owns, including Tara, will be seized. Horrified at having turn the slim pickings that populate the bar, she plans on running away, before Tara decides to decapitate The Cult reject. What this means for our Ebony and Ivory duo is anyone's guess, but the "this bitch might be my Gayle after all" look on Pam's face was priceless.

In shifter/were news, Sam and Luna played Rescue Rangers this week, transforming into mice and tracking down Emma's whereabouts to the compound. My guess is they'll get Emma back and escape, causing Steve to fly into a rage and whimper to Russell about his lost pet, who will then also fly into a rage and destroy everything in his path--including the pack of werewolves, lead by both Alcide, JD and Martha--to get her back. You don't slaughter a roomful of fratboys and slow dance to "Teenage Dream" unless you have a real love connection goin'.

People are always going in Sookie's world, so killing newly turned Mike Spencer (autopsy photos and porn in the same folder? Chile...) with a pair of chopsticks on her living room floor didn't provide much of a change of pace for her. The real twist came when she and Jason stumbled across an old scroll with unintelligible writing. A trip to the Moulin Fairy to see Claude reveals that a relative of Sookie's promised the first female fae of his family tree to Warlow. Which is, you guess it! Sookie! Talk about going, going, gone.

Everything is up in the air, and everyone is choosing sides and making moves as the finale draws near.

Other Notes:

---Holly and Andy ate a meal together, during which Andy expressed his appreciation for Lafayette's "pizzazz." A slice of normalcy and tolerance in the midst of True Blood's alternate universe.

--Was it just me or was Bill's shirt giving off Star Trek, Captain Kirk vibes?

--No Alcide? Not even an "I'm a lone wolf" long frame shot of him drinking beer in an old, beat up wife beater, contemplating what got him to this point via a series of flashbacks--Debbie on V, Sookie confessing, Sookie puking on his shoes, making love to Rikki (please flashback to that), being dissed and dismissed by JD--then cutting to a close-up shot of him with a forlorn look on his face? Nothing? Unacceptable.

So what did you think of "Gone, Gone, Gone?" Discuss.







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