In his latest vlog, Kid Fury addresses the online/real life phenomenon of fans who go into stanning overboard. You know, that delirious state of mind where you actually come to believe the star you love and support knows you personally, pays your bills, puts food in your mouth, cleans your home and pumps your gas. In its benign state, this disorder usually takes the form of vicious insults written in all caps on Internet forums, followed by postings of record sale figures and Billboard single/album chart statuses. But in its elevated psychotic form, usually aided by alcohol, strobe lights and house/R&B/techno music, this can manifest into actual physical confrontation.
Anyone whose read this blog knows I am long-time Madonna stan and will read those who seek to disrespect the queen if necessary. I consider her an icon and a visionary who has had an enormous influence on the musical and cultural landscape of the last three decades and will proudly state my case to wake foolish gals up to that fact. Particularly blind little monsters who have the audacity to leave comments on Youtube that claim classic Madonna clips like "Open Your Heart," "Vogue" and "Justify My Love" are Gaga rip offs. Honestly I fear for their inability to grasp the concept of time more than their hatred of Madge, but that's neither here nor there.
The truth of the matter is as much I may love her music and consider her an inspiration, I'm not blind to the reality that I am not, never been, and probably will never be on her radar. A girl can dream but chile, there's a thin line between fantasy and delusion. If my lights got cut off tomorrow or my fridge was bare, best believe Ms. Ciccone won't slip a check in the mail or show up at my doorstep with groceries singing "Plastic bags stuffed with food/Stomachs that are in the mood/Don't just stand there let's get to it/ Stuff your face, there's nothing it/EAT!" It ain't that serious.
Anyway, if you've watched one of the Kid's videos before, you know it's hilarious. If not be prepared to clutch your pearls, collapse, die, be buried and resurrect like it's Easter Sunday. Get into it below. Oh, and five points to whoever can name the song that inspired this post title (my southern queens probably have a clue:).