Sunday, October 18, 2009

Question of The Day: When Will We Rise Up?


Pretty much every black gay blog I've read has talked about our lack of cohesion/action as black LGBTs. I've responded on threads and blogged about why it seems so hard for us as black gays and lesbians to truly form a cohesive, outspoken community willing to stand up to the homophobia in our communities. Some say this apathy comes from the lack of outreach from mainstream (i.e. white) organizations. Others say it's because the homophobia we grew up with in church and the neighborhood have been drilled into us so deeply that at their core most black gays feel a degree shame over their sexuality. And some believe that most black gays just don't give a damn about marriage equality, hate crimes legislation, DADT, etc.

So my question is, after all the analysis and open threads and editorials have been written, what will it take? What will it take for us as black gays to rise up as an organized force and say 'No More.' No more sitting quietly while being degraded by the pastor. No more hiding our relationships or sexuality out of fear of being accused of "flaunting our lifestyle." No more feeling like we should just go along to get along, accepting whatever table scraps we can get.

I'm honestly at a loss as to what it would take for this to happen. So what do you think? Please leave comments and don't hold back (I have 8 followers so I know somebody reads this blog lol:).

11 comments:

the pulpit said...

Problem:
Too many are awaiting the sgl MalcolmX to surface and lead. Too many tormented and convicted by RELIGION. Too many non self-aware/self-actualized sgl folks. Too many psychosocial and conditioning issues amongst sgl folk.

Solutions:
The leader you await is YOU! Educate, Educate and Educate. Guess what? You don't have to be OUT to educate; closet folks can educate too ( educate friends). Stay informed. Become a critical thinker: question the religion/church that vilify and bash you. Most important demonstrate self love! Seek out positive sgl role models and mentors.

In essence, Capacity Building: equipping sgl individuals with the understanding, skills and access to information, knowledge, training and mentors that enables them to progress toward self actualization and perform as a cohesive unit effectively.

the pulpit said...

This question got me contemplating all morning long.

Michael Eric Dyson relates to it as Soul Murder in his book entitled April 4 1968.

Soul Murder: destruction of the love of life in another human being; Collective Self Hate.

Too often Black culture murders ambition, and slaughters pride; skeptical of black folks who don’t meet our narrow views of blackness; despise others who rise and prosper; whip the hell out of our children to make them obedient to what we think the Bible says, as a result, whip out ambition and initiative; and we don’t by Black, shop black because we’re TAUGHT Black isn’t good enough or beautify enough We face social alienation and demonizing.

Again I think the solution is through SGL Capacity Building: equipping sgl individuals with the understanding, skills and access to information, knowledge, training and mentors that enables them to progress toward self actualization, SELF-LOVE, and perform as a cohesive unit effectively.

.::RoCkii*BoXxE::. said...

And this is exactly what I have been wondering! When is everyone gonna stop being BITCHES! And man the hell up an stand for something besides random sex in a club bathroom. You are willing to party in the life and indulge but you are not willing to fight to keep the one thing you cant leave alone. Black people have CRABS IN A BARREL SYNDROME. they cannot stand to see another black no matter what they are succeed.


So when does some of us get together and fight! IM READY! IVE BEEN READY! I SPEAK ON THE ISSUES TO ANYONE ..GAY OR STRAIGHT AND I WILL STAND MY GROUND AND I NEVER STOP BEING ME JUST BECAUSE A FEW OTHERS ARE TOO SCARED OR SELF HATING TO DO THE JOB.


IM NOT WAITING ON ANYONE ELSE. MY TIME MAY BE SHORT HERE AND I DO NO WANT THOSE BEHIND ME TO ENDURE THE SAME SHIT IVE HAD TO! IVE GOT A LOT OF TIME TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE AND WITH OR WITHOUT THE REST OF THESE BLACK GAYS...I WILL DO MY BEST FOR MYSELF AND THOSE THAT I CAN REACH!


ITS A PITY THE BLACK GAYS ARE PLAGUED BY SELF HATRED, PASTORS FULL OF HYPOCRISY, INSATIABLE LUST AND AN STD RATE TO MATCH! To be honest I was just about abandoning them and Im not ashamed to say it. Ive read so many gay black blogs and all everyone does is talk about how much fuckin sex they have and why they dont want to come out. I have seen so much hate from a lot of these closeted individuals for those of us that are out or not even out but discreet but not afraid to tell those close to us. T


They really resent us and It makes us look bad every time they get scared and wanna run back into the closet and denounce homosexuality after last night just fuckin one of us. Its not right and we wont get any better til others of us that see these individuals and cut them off. We sacrifice a lot even telling just a small group of those around us and they treat us like crap.

WELL NOT ANY FUCKIN MORE! U ARE EITHER WITH ME OR NOT! I UNDERSTAND THESE ISSUES AND THEIR IMPORTANCE....I WILL NOT BACK DOWN BECAUSE OF COWARDICE! I CAN ONLY BE ME AND LIVE FOR ME..NOT MY FAMILY...NOT MY PARENTS...NOT ANYONE BUT ME...AND DAMMIT IM GOING TO DO IT MY WAY BECAUSE IVE EARNED IT AND STILL EARNING A LOT MORE TO COME!


I DONT KNOW WHY EVERYONE WANTS TO WAIT FOR A DAMN MAGICAL GAY MESSIAH TO COME AND LEAD. PEOPLE CAN BE SUCH COWARDS AND IF WE WAIT FOR THEM...IT WILL NEVER COME. IF I KEEP ON THE PATH IM ON...I MAY BE FAMOUS WITHIN THE NEXT 2 YEARS AND I KNOW FOR SURE I WILL DO EVERYTHING I CAN TO EDUCATE THEM ON THEIR WAYS AND HELP THOSE THAT I CAN.



"IF I CAN HELP SOMEBODY, THEN MY LIVING SHALL NOT BE IN VAIN"


*DELLA!

SORRY I WAS SO LONG WINDED, BUT THE BLACK GAY COMMUNITY MAKES ME THINK THERE IS NO HOPE FOR THEM...WE'VE JUST GOT TO TAKE THOSE WE CAN AND LEAVE THE REST BEHIND. CANT HELP THOSE THAT DO NOT WANT TO BE HELPED! IVE HAD TO LEARN THAT THE HARD WAY.

.::RoCkii*BoXxE::. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
.::RoCkii*BoXxE::. said...

BY THE WAY..I WILL BE PROMOTING THIS POST FROM THIS BLOG TO EVERYONE I KNOW!

I HOPE YOU DONT MIND!

.::RoCkii*BoXxE::. said...

SORRY I KEEP POSTING BUT IM ALL PUMPED UP NOW! LETS GO! LOL

IM PRETTY SURE THE DL'S THAT FOLLOW THE BLOG I LINKED THIS POST TO, WILL COME HERE TRYING TO JUSTIFY THEIR WAYS AND ATTEMPT TO PUT THEMSELVES HIGHER THAN US AND MAKE ALL OF THE ISSUES WE ARE DISCUSSING SEEM SMALL AND NOT WORTH IT.

one thing ive learned about secrets and skeletons in your closet....esp with these DL men...

SOMEONE ALWAYS KNOWS!!!!!

Kevin said...

BY THE WAY..I WILL BE PROMOTING THIS POST FROM THIS BLOG TO EVERYONE I KNOW!

I HOPE YOU DONT MIND!

Nope, promote away lol!

ZION`OLOGY said...

wow my bro della hit the nail on the head...as much as we promote freedom and world change and understandin...we manage to degrade ourselves at the sametime wth all this shit...the black gay community seems to be all bout sex nothing more...just educate urself be more than that...you have so many doors to break down....for the next generation of gays to feel free to be free...u have so many minds to change for the better...so get it togeher and do that!!!

ToddyEnglish said...

I have to agree with miss Della and the pulpit...

Our biggest problem is that we continually allow the heterosexist black community (honey, I don't care what anyone says...The black community is more virulently homophobic than ANY other. I maybe generalizing like hell but there it is...)to define ourselves for ourselves. We've been thoroughly conditioned to hate who we are. Therefore we in turn internalize all the negativity espoused by the church (which is ironically supposed to be for healing)and, in spite of being what we are, we try and alter WHO we are just to adhere to what they say is noble and virtuous...

Myself, I languished in self hatred throughout my teen years. I was even involved in a "relationship" with a man on the DL. It was not until I decided that I wanted to lead a full and authentic life that I came out, religion be damned.

Furthermore, when I needed affirmation and healing it was the mainstream gay community that helped me. Now, I am openly gay and not ashamed to be so. I am WORTHY to be myself and I don't care what a damn pastor (who is probably whoring it up with his deacons and choir boys)has to say about.

The ignorance regarding homosexuality in the black community is CRAZY. They have reduced us to being: pedophiles and DL men looking to infect hapless black women with AIDS.

My advice is...

1.) Information - Instead of ridiculing white LGBT people why not befriend and LEARN from them? Honey, I got so much information about gay life in the past few years. Although it didn't speak directly to my experience as a black gay man I reappropriated for myself.

2.) Come out - I'm sorry but the whole DL attitude is what's keeping us in the closet. Kids, gay life isn't about being one big sexathon. Instead of holding it in and waiting to use every hapless young boi as a cum dumpster why not man up and be REAL and nurture a true PROSPEROUS gay life.


I think the collective black gay community needs healing, seriously. We are damaged in a way that white LGBT people are not.

Wonder Man said...

We will rise when we have clear leadership, stop following false prophets, and realize who we are.

We need to stand up for ourselves and support one another

the pulpit said...

PS: My final thought!

Carter G. Woodson explained it best in his 1933 book: The Mis-Education of the Negro. Read this as often as needed:

“If you can control a man’s thinking, you do not have to worry about his action. If you make a man feel that he is inferior, you do not have to compel him to accept an inferior status, for he will seek it himself. If you can make a man think that he is justly an outcast, you do not have to order him to the back door. He will go without being told: And if there is no back door, his very nature will demand one.”

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