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| Photo: Guy D' Alema/FX |
"I wanna be valued as a human being, and not as an accessory you can fuck." Those blunt words belong to none other than Vanessa Keefer, a.k.a Van. After sitting out of the first two half hours and running with the crew in last week's "Big Money Shawty," Atlanta's leading lady takes center stage in this week's episode, "Helen."
All the action centers around she and Earn's road trip to the norhtern village of Helen for fastnacht, an Oktoberfest festival.
On the drive up, Van expresses concern Earn won't like spending day among these whitest of white folk, and sadly, her instincts prove to be right; Earn is very much out of his element, and reacts with typical dry detachment and slow burning, too-cool-for-school hostility. Things get off to a shitty start for Earn as his (and many black folks') Halloween nightmare comes to life when a white woman runs up him, gushing over his "costume" before touching his face and realizing nope, that's not blackface. No wonder he opts to wear a Jason mask.
Van tries her best, coaching him through festival games, but things take a decidely left turn when he pulls her away from the dancefloor for ping pong, then bitching her out when she beats him "in front of people." People being a single, silent creepily masked dude. Van rightfully calls out him for acting like a baby, and he continues to have a temper tantrum, whining about not wanting to be at fastnacht before curtly telling her not turn her nose up at having Alfred's concerts count as their quality time, because the weekend shows "pay her fucking bills."
Classic Earn. He wants to spend time with Van, but only on his terms and in spaces where he feels comfortable. His reaction to unfamilar surroundings is similar to their last coupled social outing in last season's "Juneteenth." Then Earn decreeing the bougie excess of Van's friend Monique and the one-man cultural appropriation show that was her husband Craig was a sex-in-the-car worthy turn on. Now, she's just tired.
Van also has the rug pulled out from under her once again with another childhood friend. This time around it's Christina, who awkwardly introduces her to another couple as "Lottie's mom." Van confronts her about this and is hit with the "bitch wah?!" explanation she can pull off being a baby mama because she "chose black."
Now given the fact Christina ain't exactly light bright her damn self, she must be saying Van "chose black" in the cultural sense of the word. With her white boyfriend Dave, BFFs like Flo (also melanin-deficient) and penchant for making remarks like wishing her hair was kinky when she clearly calls Dr. Miracle every six weeks, she opted for Beckyhood early on. But while she is most certainly wrong--as in chile deal with your internalized anti-blackness--she is not wrong that Van could've and still could have a life similar to hers if she really wanted it. Like Earn, her blackness is more malleable, less threatening than say, Alfred's; and seeing how easily she mingles among the festival folk, it'd wouldn't take much effort for the self-proclaimed Serena Williams of fastnacht to slide into the "my black friend" role.
Having a Dave at her side would be a vast improvement over Earn's moody, aimless ass. As the festival winds down, she challenges him to a second game of ping pong. Now the stakes are higher; if she wins, the only conversations they'll have going forward will be about Lottie or money. Like last week's ill-fated Michael Vick parking lot showdown, we don't stick around for the full match, though the quiet, determined look on Van's face gives a good indication of where this is going. She turns down the ride home blunt Earn offers, keeps her answers short when they arrive back at her home, and closes the door when he leaves in a way that says "but you can't use my phone."
Van appears, at least for now, to be completely and totally done.
Other Thoughts:
--Speaking of horror, there were several moments in 'Helen' that were giving off the black stranger-in-strange-white-land vibe of Get Out.
--To my Louisiana eyes, the sight of beer, lederhosen and unique (yea that's the right word) creature costumes conjure up images of an annual Czech festival held in Libuse and Mardi Gras done Mamou style.
--Apparently when Earn is sober and goes downtown on Van, he lacks tongue confidence. Didn't know this was a thing, but not the least bit surprised Earn is cursed with it.
--Are black women classified as brunettes?
--From Jayde to Christina, Van may need to avoid childhood friends like a plauge from now on.
--Earn didn't come off well at all this episode--he didn't even bother clean up like he did in "Juneteenth"--but he exercised much restraint in not punching the cell-phone stealing monster in the face. Much restraint.
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